Utter rubbish

Monday this weeek was a disaster. The "idiots?" and I had a major crisis. They were out fitting in a school and the carpet needed to colour match because it was being joined in places. "Chief boss husband idiot?" phoned in to tell me they didn't colour match. I hadn't placed the order and didn't know what the "idiot?" who placed the order had asked for. If he hadn't asked for a colour match we were in major shit. We were in the shit anyway because of the timing factor but this could be really bad. was the fellow co. worker "idiot?" here to sort it out? NO he had gone on a QUICK MEASURE over an hour before the first telephone call. "Don't worry" says I "he can't be much longer." so every two minutes after that I got a phone call "is he back yet?" "NO if he was you would have heard." Of course we were phoning his mobile phone but that was sat in the van sunning itself on the seat! After numerous phone calls every two minutes I got my bum in a knot and told "chief boss husband idiot?" "I'VE HAD ENOUGH OF THIS" and off I went in search of the missing "idiot?". I drove down to the industrial estate where he was supposed to be doing the QUICK measure. I had no idea where the unit was we where he was supposed to be. Eventually I spotted his van. I zoomed in to the car park where he was. Of course there was loads of tradesman about doing whatever tradesman do. In to the building I went. I stood and listened. I could hear him talking but I needed to track him down upstairs or downstairs? now I think about it I did a great job wending myself through the building to the sound of his voice. There he was having a merry old time chatting away with a painter. In I stomped and said through gritted teeth "WILL YOU PLEASE COME BACK TO THE SHOP NOW. WE ARE HAVING A CRISIS YOU NEED TO SOLVE AND I HAVE BEEN PHONING YOU FOR OVER AN HOUR AND THIRTY MINUTES." He looked at me with his usual gormless expression and said "OK" I turned on my heel and swished out. I could hear the painter saying to me as swished "All right ****" I had no idea who he was I hadn't even looked at him in my haste to get in and out. It turned out to be the customer who owned the building OOOPS. Whilst driving back I kept looking in my mirror to see if he had obeyed my request and had acutually dragged himself away. He showed up about five minutes after me. I suppose he thought he was hurrying!!