You don't look very brown

"Ooh did you enjoy your holiday? your not very brown" I have heard that once too often this week. I do not have a sun tan I will never have a sun tan. I wear factor 30 sunscreen whilst I am on holiday and replenish it every 5 minutes if I don't I would look like a lobster and that's not a good look so any one who knows me you now don't need to comment!





Now back to the "idiots?"


yesterday started really well (not) I had organised with one of the " idiots?" to cut 2 x doors at 9.30 off he went in his van all loaded to site without a thought for the doors. Luckily another fellow co. worker ("idiot?") stepped in to the breach and the customer is none the wiser. When asked later in the day "did you forget something this morning?" he still didn't twig. I really feel some days I'm fighting a losing battle.

Today has started no better, after leaving very early to pick up some material that was delivered the wrong colour my fellow co. worker "idiot?" other half has been sitting in traffic at Bristol for over an hour. Somehow he thinks if he phones me to tell me I can make the traffic move faster! I am writing this at 10.30 and so far I have dealt with the traffic situation, an irate fellow co. worker who thinks I can make the fitters move faster, an irate customer because a fellow co. worker made a mistake on planning her insallation so we will have to replace her lounge (obviously at no cost to them and considerable cost to us) an irate customer who does not want pay the invoice I sent them for uplift and disposal of their carpet (we have agreed after much shouting on their behalf yesterday to meet half way) and an injured fellow co. worker( "idiot?") because the handle fell off the unit roller shutter door and hit him on the nose. I am seriously considering booking another holiday to get over my first week back.

I didn't know they cared

Well I'm back from my hunt for the sun, and I can't think of anywhere I would rather be. I actually started back to work on Saturday morning which before I went seemed like a good idea, but when the crunch came I didn't want to get out of my bed on Saturday and I certainly did not want to be behind this desk. Never the less I made it to work nearly on time, we open at 8.30 and I suppose it was about 8.40 when I rolled in to the car park (of course I needed to peg out the washing first, and I didn't want my breakfast at my desk) I looked to my left as I parked up and there was one of my fellow co. workers parking up beside me, Ah I thought he must of missed me, in I came and went through the setting up procedure 1. kettle on 2. check I have brushed my hair 3. turn on the radio etc. etc. until I get to open door and put out the open sign, out I struggle (the bloody thing weighs a tone) and what do I see? another fellow co. worker driving down the road. Now this is not right, this particular fellow co. worker can't get to work on the days he's supposed to work let alone on a Saturday when he doesn't. Bear in mind now the kettle is on but I have not yet had a cup of tea to get me remotely in the mood for anything resembling work. I make tea for four instead of the two I had catered for, and then the fellow co. workers (idots?) off load the weeks happenings, they didn't seem capable of holding on to any of the information until Monday it all just had to be off loaded from their head into mine and the hubby's and then they buggered off! I'm so glad to be back, I need to go home and book another holiday in the sun.

How much?

My fellow co. worker ("idiot?") went to the satationers to purchase the replacement cartridge for the printer/photocopier of course he phoned for the serial numbers when he got there -he couldn't possiby have taken the serial numbers before he went!- and we painfully went through the conversation "what's the serial number?" so I told him "no no that can't be right they haven't got that" off I go and check again of course it was the right number so I repeat it. "No no they haven't got one" he says so I repeat it again and I here "HOW MUCH do you know how much a replacement cartridge is? I'm not paying that!" so I inform my fellow co. worker he will purchase the replacement cartridge for the extortionate price as his penance for letting it run out without us having a spare. On his return from his shopping he checked out the interweb where a replacement catridge was 1/3rd of the price he had to pay I told him to order two but I don't think he has so I will just wate and see what happens when this one runs out.

This will be my last blog for at least a week because I am off to find the sun, I know you will miss me and my fellow co. workers but rest assured whilst I am away they will be running wild creating plenty of blog material! Bye for nowxx

Just too organised

Today I've been just too organised. I'm off to try and find the sun on Friday so I thought I would get everything typed up and invoiced today for when I'm away. Have I succeeded NO I have been thwarted by the bloody printer/photocopier. It will do no more until it has had it's toner cartridge replaced "oh" said my fellow co. worker (idiot?) we haven't got a replacement I used the spare a while ago. Why oh why when he replaced it did he not order another one? now instead of a easy few days before I go away it will be a mad scramble to photo copy and print the invoices and work sheets. Why is my life never straightforward!

Is there a man about?

I am asked this question at least once a day "is there a man about?" I want to say "no but if there was he would probably be an idiot and absolutely no good to you so can I help?" but I don't. When I first started in this trade it was definately a mans world, but I was hoping that things had moved on a bit, but they haven't. Last week my other half and I were working in the shop and in came a mans man. This is the type of man that thinks a woman is just for decoration and cooking his tea so it was obvious to him I wouldn't be able to help him, so he walked past me and started to talk to the other half. Now if he had bothered to stop and talk to me I could have told him if you want your flooring fitted he's your man, because I can't even lift the tool box. But if you want help with your selection and how much it's going to cost etc. he 'aint got a clue. Any how I finally convinced this nice chap that he really wanted me to serve him and off we went to discuss his requirements. As usual he wanted to purchase the best product available but didn't want to spend any money, and flooring really isn't rocket science the more money you spend the better the product you get. So being a frugal man he decided our stock vinlyl was what he wanted to purchase. "o.k Love" he said "I'll come back when ...... one of my fellow co. workers ("idiot?") is here because he'll give me a good price! Delivery men are the same "hello love are there any boys about?" "NO" "oh well I can't get this off by my self where's your fork lift?" "we haven't got any boys, we haven't got a forklift SO JUST GET IT OFF!) and nine times out of ten they do.

Milk in first or after?

Today some of my fellow co. workers ("idots?") and I, have been discussing the humble cup of tea. I prefer my milk in first not too much not too little and don't take my tea bag out with a sugary spoon or a spoon that has been in coffee because I can taste it. I'm not difficult to please honestly! But the humble cup of tea is very important to me, and I am not above saying "I can't drink that it's vile" and wandering off to tip it down the sink and make my own. This makes me ponder how when we use the same water milk and tea bags can some of us make tea and others not. My fellow co. worker ("idiot?") who is on holiday at the moment made me a cup of tea the other day, before I continue I should comment that this is a very rare occurance, and I am not kidding you it was not fit for human consumption. How did he do that? I made every other cup of tea that day and they were fine, but his offering was dark bitter and vile. My fellow co. workers ("idiots?") always say to me you make nice tea, you go and make it, I'm sure the only reason my tea is so nice is because I make gallons of it. My washing up must be the best as well because they always leave that for me as well.

Please don't roll your eyes at me

Today we have been short of ("idiot?") fellow co. workers as four of them are on a day off. But I have had my share of ( "idiot?") customers. Obviously even the "idiots" have their role within the company that keep the cogs turning, and when they are not here the rest of us ("idiots?") have to try and cover their work. I have just served a customer who wanted to buy 6 carpet tiles (massive order -NOT-) and I informed them I would have to phone them with the price when I can check how much they are, but they come in packs of 2o. I understand they only want six so I said "tell you what I will find out the cost of the tiles you looked at and then get someone to check in the store to see if anything there will do the job and you wont have buy more than you need" did they say "THANK YOU that would be really helpful" NO THEY DID NOT. He rolled his eyes and said "How much are these" I remained calm and repeated "I will phone you with the price of the tiles and see if we have any in stock that might do the job and you can buy 6 instead of 20" How many shops can you go in that will try to sell you what you want rather than trying to sell you more than twice the amount you need? I really wish I hadn't bothered, because I'm damn sure if I had known the price of the tiles off the top of my head he would have just gone ahead an bought the twenty.

Special people

This week has been a short week and a really odd week.


It seems to have been a week where I have encountered "special people" you know "special people" too I am sure. They are the people who think they can pick and choose. My fellow co. worker ("idot?") that wanted to hide in the office today was out of luck, because today was a manic day. But not only is he an "idot?" his is also a "special" person. This morning he was in the office with someone when another person phoned to discuss a problem, but being a "special" person he chose not to speak to them. Now me being not a "special" person had to deal with them and their problem and the other one hundred and fifty things I was trying to do all at the same time. My fellow co. worker "idiot? special" person got such an ear full when I had a chance, and all he did was shrug his shoulders and say "I couldn't speak to them I was doing something" one thing he was doing one thing, oh I wish I was "special."

Some of my fellow co. workers "idots?" were also asked yesterday if they could do a couple of jobs that were out of the ordinary, one is to fit some carpet tiles in the hockey goals at the leisure centre and another was a couple of evenings at a local factory instead of a Saturday, they are apparently also "special" people because they can pick and choose and they chose to decline. The carpet tiles and factory job will get done, probably by my fellow co. worker who I am married to (THE BOSS!) I have definately had a week where some of my fellow co. workers ("idots?" or "special people") have made me question if you are doing all the out of hours and horrible unusual things yourself why do you worry about keeping them in a job?
May be next week me and the "boss" will be special for a change and let's see how they get on!

I'm Back

I came back to help the "idots?" out yesterday, but it was all a bit up in the air so I didn't get time to blog. I was a bit of an "idiot?" myself actually, and seen as I always dwell on my fellow co. workers failings in the interests of fairness I should also mention my own when they occur. This is not an excuse but an observation. One of my fellow co. workers ("idiot?") who does the measures always writes in pencil, and I have mentioned to him before that I have great difficulty in reading his writing it's not the clearest writing in the world, and because it's in pencil it all just merges, and yesterday it transpired for the second time I have mis-read 4.00 instead of 4.40 and you don't need a degree in carpet retail to work out that 4.00 is not going to fit when the room is 4.40 long, unlike my fellow co. worker who would have tried to bluff his way out of this situation I find it much easier just to own up to the unhappy customer and tell them it's my fault, and then order a new one a bit quick and get it all sorted out. I am just a bit concerned that I might be turning into an "idiot?" permanantly and I would welcome any reassurance you can give me.

My fellow co. worker ("idiot?) that is causing me to mis-read things is going on Holiday on Saturday (It might be a slow blogging week but the rest will do me good) I wish I could tell you he was going somewhere exotic but his idea of a good holiday is Butlins at Minehead although this time he's branching out and hiring a caravan in Devon. This morning he told me that although he is at work tomorrow he will not be available for enquirees or measures. Now I am wondering who is an "idiot" me or him, because when I am going away I have to work twice as hard before I go and ten times as hard when I get back. I am undecided how tomorrow will go, I some how think he will not get away with hiding in the office.